The Book is Here!
We got in a big delivery of books today, so those who have requested it will be getting your copies. Local friends: if you would like me to bring a copy to you, let me know! We are also beginning plans for a publication party in late July or early August, so stay tuned!
And for you folks who aren't local, the easiest way to get a copy is through Lulu.com:
The Radical History of Mother’s Day | NationofChange
Enjoying the day here with the family, and thought this post was a good one for remembering the true intent of the holiday. Happy Mother’s Day to all!
What Happens To 3 Out Of 4 Girls After Leafing Through A Fashion Mag For 3 Minutes?
In following up on Nancy’s post about unequal pay for women, here is a good video for considering the question of how to get more girls and women into leadership roles. What Happens To 3 Out Of 4 Girls After Leafing Through A Fashion Mag For 3 Minutes?
Black and White Twins
This is an interesting story of how one family in England dealt with racism and ostracism when they had a very unique set of twins — Daniel and James. Black and white twins | Life and style | The Guardian.
Stop! In The Name Of...Terrible Baby Names
As the wife and I (but mainly the wife) reach halftime of pregnancy #3, I thought an update might be in order. 20 weeks down, 20 more to go. Based on results from the first two matchups, I don't expect this to go to overtime. There's no doubt that Mommy showed up ready to play, but as the half wore on, she seemed to tire and even had to fight off a few bouts of nausea.
Obituary for My Mother, Ann Marie (Nancy) Stoppleworth
Ann Marie (Nancy) Stoppleworth passed away on July 22, 2011 in Providence, RI. She was born in Waterbury, Connecticut, on August 3, 1925, the oldest daughter of Mary and William Dwyer. Nancy was a graduate of Saint Francis Nursing School for her RN, Georgetown University for her Bachelors degree in Nursing, and The University of Connecticut for her Masters degree in Anthropology. She joined the convent twice as a young woman before choosing to live the secular life. She married Leland J. Stoppleworth on July 5, 1958, and was the mother of seven children.
Nancy led a successful career as a nurse and nursing administrator, serving as a nurse in many hospitals, visiting nursing services, and finally as the Chief of Nursing for the State of Connecticut Mental Health Services. Nancy was a devout lifelong Catholic who carried out the church’s mission of charity in myriad ways including serving the homeless in soup kitchens and shelters, caring for poor families in the community, participating in prayer groups and prayer lines for the sick, traveling to Haiti for charitable mission work, and establishing charitable annuities for medical and educational purposes with Maryknoll Sisters and Salesian missions.
In 2004, Nancy donated 55 acres of land to the town of Tolland, Connecticut in order to create the Stoppleworth Conservation area, a pristine and beautiful open space for all to enjoy. Nancy was a lifelong journal-writer, who left behind scores of honest and brave reflections on her many life dilemmas, successes, and concerns. She loved reading and knowledge, swimming in Bolton Lake, going to the beach, and spending time with her children and grandchildren.
She is survived by two sisters, Helen Stephenson and Lyn Jacoby, who reside in California, and six of her seven children: Laura Reave and husband Robert Reave of London, Ontario; Amalia Delorenzo of Guerneville, California; Anne Weber and husband Garry Weber of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania; Maria Dugan and husband Douglas Dugan of Brooklyn, New York; John Stoppleworth and wife Janice Kloo of Manchester, Connecticut; and Kiersten Marek and husband Kevin Marek of Cranston, Rhode Island. Her youngest child, Angela, died in childhood due to a muscular disease. She is also survived by grandchildren Melanie Reave; Seth Martel; Bryan, Paul, and Charles Weber; Elena, Avra, Isaiah and Patrick Dugan; and Katrina and Kalliana Marek.
Services for Nancy will take place at Church of the Ascension, 390 Pontiac Avenue, Cranston at 10 am on Wednesday, July 27, with reception to follow. Donations in lieu of flowers may be made to Maryknoll Sisters, P.O. Box 311, Maryknoll NY 10545.
Calling Hours will be from 6 – 8 PM at our home at 109 Waterman Avenue on Tuesday evening. Please send an email to me if you are planning to come.
The Warrior in All of Us
Oh, the warriors within us! Longfellow said it eloquently: ”If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we should find in each man’s … suffering enough to disarm all hostility.” Indeed. And yet, we do find many things to argue about. Usually it’s not so much about the subject as it is about someone being on your turf.
As parents we spend a certain amount of energy interacting with our warrior children — hopefully this is only a small part of your relationship, but sometimes it can go on for too long, and it might be worth further exploring your internal warrior — the part of you that engages quickly in conflict, the part that escalates even as you know it isn’t good, not right or healthy or even sane.
Same holds true for marriages. Hopefully you are not spending the majority of your time interacting with your partner’s warrior, but we’ve all been there, and when it gets really ugly, it’s no fun. John Gottman talks about the four horsemen of the relationship apocalypse and one of them is “contempt.” When the conflict gets to the point that you genuinely begin to feel contempt for your partner, it’s time to get help.
I enjoy helping clients explore the parts of them that get in the way of harmonious relationships, the parts that bring more conflict into their lives than they need or want. Sometimes what lies beneath the fightin’ mad part of us is a very interesting part — a creator or a fool or an innocent — who wants to enjoy life or work at something more important. But with the warrior always being in conflict, these other archetypes don’t get the time and attention that they deserve.
(cross-posted from my private practice site.)
One of the 8,000 Chemicals You Should Definitely Avoid
There is a growing awareness, particularly in our younger generation, that we need to do something about the 8,000 chemicals in our environment that are floating around unregulated. I am hoping for a generation of young warriors who will bring some level of safety standards to our environment and make sure chemical companies pay their fair share for the do-over. One particular chemical that I am joining Dr. Mercola in focusing on is an “anti-foaming agent” that is put on McDonald’s Chicken Mcnuggets. From the good doctor:
Do you put dimethylpolysiloxane, an anti-foaming agent made of silicone, in your chicken dishes?
How about tertiary butylhydroquinone (TBHQ), a chemical preservative so deadly that just five grams can kill you?
These are just two of the ingredients in a McDonalds Chicken McNugget. Only 50 percent of a McNugget is actually chicken. The other 50 percent includes corn derivatives, sugars, leavening agents and completely synthetic ingredients.
I will admit to eating my share of chicken McNuggets over the years, and I’ve noticed that they have a weird bitter aftertaste, particularly when cold. Well, just one more reason to try to avoid fast food and processed foods whenever possible.
Wages O’ Sin
Just a typical 20-year-old girl who might go to college. A good girl who made a bad choice, but now talks to teens about abstinence.
Bristol Palin bought a house with $172,000 in cash.
God bless America, land of opportunity. If only more young people would follow her example.
In related news, Nadya Suleman, aka Octomom, is facing eviction from the house where she raises 14 children in four bedrooms. She can’t keep up with the mortgage.
Sarah Palin should invite her to Alaska. The exposure would translate into income, which Ms. Suleman badly needs. Show some charity, Sarah, help a fellow celebrity. She can boost your reality show too, it’s all good.
And let’s send a Christmas wish to the original owners of the Bristol house, who paid twice what she paid, and got foreclosed. Tough luck for making ‘bad choices’. I can’t find any info about them on the net. They could have been among the many who bought houses during the real estate bubble, only to find themselves with an underwater mortgage. After the crash, in the normal course of things, rich people will pick up bargains. It’s the way of nature, like a daughter grizzly eating a baby moose.
Laboring for Health
Since it’s Labor Day, it seems only fitting to share a news item relevant to those who truly know what it is like to endure labor, mothers. The article, which is a couple of weeks old (making it ancient in the Information Age), concerns a potential link between prenatal exposure to pesticides and the future development of attention deficit disorders. That such a link may exist is not entirely surprising. But it is alarming nonetheless. We live amid a multitude of toxins, which individually and in combination may impact the most vulnerable among us in ways that we cannot always imagine or appreciate. At least, not until the body of scientific data and the resulting public uproar become too powerful to ignore. In the meantime, it pays to be attentive and cautious.
From U.S. News & World Report:
Pesticide Exposure in the Womb Increases ADHD Risk
Exposure to pesticides while in the womb may increase the odds that a child will have attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, according to researchers at the University of California-Berkeley School of Public Health. Combine that with research published in May in Pediatrics finding that children exposed to pesticides were more likely to have ADHD, and it’s enough to make parents wonder how to reduce their family’s exposure to pesticides.
The California researchers are studying the impact of environmental exposures on the health of women and children who live in the Salinas Valley, an agricultural region with heavy pesticide use. They tested the urine of pregnant women for pesticide residue, and then tested the behavior of their children at ages 3½ and 5. The 5-year-olds who had been exposed to organophosphate pesticides while in the womb had more problems with attention and behavior than did children who were not exposed. What’s more, the heavier the pesticide exposure, the more likely that the child would have symptoms of ADHD . The results were published online in Environmental Health Perspectives.
This isn’t proof that pesticides cause ADHD, but since organophosphate pesticides are neurotoxins that kill pests by disrupting neurotransmitters that carry signals though the brain, it’s easy to imagine that exposure to organophosphate might interfere with brain function and development. [full article]
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