The Revelations of George W. Bush

Hold your breath, America, but it appears that the fog of denial which has shrouded the sclerotic gray matter of George W. Bush may finally be lifting. An article in the Washington Post reports that “President Bush acknowledged for the first time yesterday that the United States is not winning the war in Iraq.� [Insert gasp of surprise here.] In a candid interview with the Post, Mr. Bush also acknowledged—albeit grudgingly—various other facts that have recently dawned on him, including the following:

• The moon is not composed of cheese and is, in fact, not a dairy product at all.
• Holding your breath until you turn blue will not induce the enemy to surrender.
• Kenneth Lay is not just on vacation.
• The Oakland Raiders will not be going to the Super Bowl this year.
• Despite its green color, money does not actually grow on trees.
• The name of the author, Camus, does not rhyme with shamus.
• Rocky mountain oysters are not oysters at all.
• Professional wrestling is not real.
• That was not just a friendly pat on the backside from Mark Foley.
• Simply saying something is so does not make it so.

4 thoughts on “The Revelations of George W. Bush”

  2. David, I have a problem with #10.

    Joseph Goebbels once said: shout something in someone’s ear long enough and hard enough, and it will start coming out of his mouth.

    Look at how Bush/Cheney pulled off the successful lie that Saddam was behind 9/11. They kept saying it and people believed it. That it wasn’t true was irrelevant. It’s enough that people believe it.

    Fortunately, we’re finally getting to the point where you can’t fool all of the people all of the time.

    Sorry, I realize this was supposed to be whimsical, but, when it comes to the Reich-Wing Propaganda Machine, I lose my sense of humor rather quickly.

  3. I’m with klaus on #10. Junior would never allow Himself to succumb to that Fact any more than he allows Himself to acknowledge the reality of any other facts that don’t jibe with his preconceived perceptions. In fact, Goebbel’s First Postulate is so firmly entrenched throughout the current Administration that it’s obviously underlying every press release, federal appointment, and government program initiative. These guys have taken Bait & Switch to heights that even St. Ronald Reagan never imagined. Ronnie had to fall back on physiological imperfections; i.e “I don’t recall….” Junior just fine-tunes his perception of reality to adhere to his preconceptions: “We’re not winning the war, but we are not losing it.”

    Excuse me, but I just need to ask.

    Do any of you folks who read this blog really believe these guys in power will give that up and allow another presidential election without some insurance that they retain their power? OK, I know we’re all conspiracy-leery, but look at the facts and project your own conclusions.

    Call me crazed, but I’m willing to bet the farm that the 2008 election takes place under martial law. If at all.

    There is no reason for the current administration to allow a different one to replace it.

    The current Administration controls the voting machines.

    Period.

  4. You know, pugpusher, I hear you. There are two things, IMHO, that argue against your very intriguing theory.

    I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that there were…thoughts (maybe not quite plans) for some sort of coup like you’re suggesting. However, I think that it depended on Junior’s viability as a figurehead. No one would stand for a Cheney dictatorship. And now that Junior is down under 30% approval, I’m not sure that a coup, or martial law would fly.

    Plus, Junior very much gives the impression that he can’t high-tail it back to his ranch fast enough. He’s never had to deal with so much adversity, and he seems to find it very unpleasant. He’s like a sulky kid. So, now that it’s not fun anymore, I think he’s lost all interest.

    My sense is that, at this point, he’s just trying to hang on in Iraq until he can off-load the problem onto someone else–preferably a Dem. Then, when (if?) we do leave, he’ll be leading the chorus that his plan would have worked if we’d just stuck to it longer.

    Bottom line: While Rove, Cheney et al may have talked about such a move, their plans were so poorly conceived and executed that circumstances have made it next to impossible.

    But then, they have greatly increased the stature of the super-wealthy. With enough money, and control of oil, they don’t need a coup. The rich can run the show behind the scenes, like they did in the Gilded Age. You just buy the gov’t. Much less messy.

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