Newt Gingrich has not only won the South Carolina primary. He’s also won the coveted Chuck Norris endorsement.

Newt couldn’t kick his way out of a paper bag but he’s got a mean mouth on him. And both Newt and Norris are lady’s men—you need a flow chart to keep track of their marriages, affairs and divorces.

If a not-plumber, not named Joe, could represent the real honest working man in 2008, maybe Chuck Norris will lend Newt some of his charm. He really is nicer than Steven Seagal, and Newt hasn’t got a chance with Jackie Chan.