Paris Hilton’s Cranston Connection

Sometimes you get the best news from The Globe. I’m not talking about the Globe and Mail, or the Boston Globe. I’m talking about the small, square Globe you read in the checkout line. The Globe is the only paper that covers the Bush’s impending divorce, which may be impending for the rest of their lives if they stay married, but no matter.

The Globe had the story the Journal didn’t find fit to print– Paris Hilton’s half-aunt is a graduate of Cranston University. If you pursue sex and drugs and the wild life and you don’t have mega bucks you might end up like the Hilton black sheep, Elizabeth Avanzino, who didn’t get special treatment at the A.C.I., and is not being interviewed by Larry King.

I could get snippy about the values of obscenely rich people who let one of their family live on the street, but money doesn’t cure everything. Families break their hearts and bank accounts trying vainly to save loved ones from self-destruction, so who knows? It doesn’t look like the Hiltons tried, but maybe they did.

I’m just glad Paris didn’t run anyone over. I hope they don’t let her have the car keys.