According to British scientist Stephen Hawking, E.T. and his alien compadres are somewhere out there in the vastness of the universe and presumably possess the soul of an investment banker. If you thought complex derivatives and other financial weapons of mass destruction were scary, just wait until the aliens arrive to plunder the planet for personal profit. Like Bear Stearns or Lehman Brothers, the Earth will go belly up, and we’ll all be homeless. Well, everyone except the crafty folks at Goldman Sachs, who bet against the planet’s survival. And maybe the citizens of Arizona, who don’t take too kindly to illegal aliens.
Anyway, here’s what Hawking had to say:
Aliens may exist but mankind should avoid contact with them as the consequences could be devastating, British scientist Stephen Hawking warned Sunday.
“If aliens visit us, the outcome would be much as when Columbus landed in America, which didn’t turn out well for the Native Americans,” said the astrophysicist in a new television series, according to British media reports.
The programmes depict an imagined universe featuring alien life forms in huge spaceships on the hunt for resources after draining their own planet dry.
“Such advanced aliens would perhaps become nomads, looking to conquer and colonise whatever planets they can reach,” warned Hawking. [link]