Grief on Christmas

This isn’t crazy. The young man I saw lying on the floor at the IMH, wetting his finger to pick up bits of dirt, which he ate– he was crazy.


“Yelling, screaming, for us it wasn’t that unusual,” said Frank.

But something about the voice on Christmas Day grabbed Diana’s attention. The woman used no words, just vented an unspeakable sorrow.

“I said someone died there,” Diana recalled on Sunday afternoon. “I just knew.”

Tragically, her intuition was correct, and the police are calling it homicide.

The screams had come from Linda Silva, who had just found the body of her daughter, Staria Silva, in the second-floor apartment at 9 Fifth St. Staria’s twin nine-month-old daughters lay crying not far from their mother.

Raymond Grundy was following a well-worn script when he murdered the mother of his children. He wounded a community and devastated a family. But the story of the poor put-upon man who couldn’t take it anymore is probably the story playing in his mind. He’s not crazy, he’s acting true to form.

No remedy now, we will lock him up till he gets back out. In the long run, we have to so disgrace the domestic abuser that no one will want to play that role.

Thank you to the Providence Journal reporters Kate Bramson and Paul Edward Parker, who looked past the lurid crime to the suffering and loss of Staria Silva’s family. We need more reporters who will show us the true cost of crime.

If you know of anyone who needs help and advice on stopping domestic violence, call–

1-800-494-8100 or go online at

Help yourself or someone you know.


5 thoughts on “Grief on Christmas

  1. Exactly.So I get a little(a lot,actually)disgusted when some vicious killer suddenly displays a “talent” in prison and draws wannabe do-gooders like flies trying to spring them,like Jack Henry Abbot.
    Abbot was an institutionalized lowlife who attracted the attention of Norman Mailer.Mailer manipulated his release and Abbot soon after being feted as a talented author murdered a young man working as a waiter simply because he asked him not to urinate just outside the back door of the restaurant.The waiter was newly married and bothering no one,just doing his job.Thankfully,Abbot died in prison.
    Look at the case in Cumberland,a few days earlier-the news reports indicated the victim had been in fear of her husband for years.
    I believe Rhode Island is better than some other states because the law mandates the police to arrest the assailant with evidence of injury present.Fear doesn’t get to rule the day.

  2. Well, I also blamed Norman Mailer for helping to get Abbot released. I think it was less from ‘do-gooding’ than from a crush Mailer had on a tough guy. He made his literary career on a macho persona. His widow, Norris Mailer, who just died last month, said in an interview that she hoped she wouldn’t re-unite with Norman in the afterlife right away because she needed a break. Norman Mailer was also a wife beater, and shooter. He hated feminists, such as this writer.
    We need the law to restrain people who threaten their partners, spouses, or anyone they put in fear.
    We need men to persuade other men that there’s nothing to admire in bullies and abusers.

  3. Well,we won’t ever argue about that.
    Being a right wing type of guy I have always respected women and I can swear I have never been abusive to anyone in a relationship,although I may have been disappointing,but I think that’s diferent.

    1. It’s not a political issue-I only mentioned it because there are those who try to smear right wingers as insensitive and abusive.

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